My Friday Blues
Grant is now 10-months old and I started the process of weaning him off of breastmilk. While I will continue to pump a couple of times a day, the overwhelming majority of his liquid intake will now be formula.
This makes me a little sad. This phase of my life is over. The “shop” is closed. Facing this reality has me feeling some kind of way. I’m a middle-aged mommy and yes I’m FABULOUS!!!! At least that’s what I keep telling myself. But if I’m being completely honest, knowing that my child-bearing years are behind me has been much harder to handle than I ever imagined.
Mommies, how did you handle this?
By: Davida Grant
The entire family went to see the movie Frozen the other day, and I have to admit I was blown away by the story line. How often do you see a kid’s movie whose main story is centered on sibling relationships? If you haven’t seen it, and you have multiple children, I urge you to see it with your kids. Talk about discussion topics for your family. Frozen offers a smorgasbord.
For the next day or so, I thought about just how important it is to foster a relationship between my kids. Thankfully, my kids seem innately drawn to each other. Simone can’t get enough of her little brother. The minute she wakes up she wants to see him, and at night she has to say, “Bye, Baby Grant,” before she goes to sleep. They see each other every day, so this isn’t too surprising. But, the very same can be said for my stepson, Frankie, who only sees Simone and Grant every other weekend. He is completely infatuated with Grant and is such the big brother. He wants to protect them and help them in every way. He’s actually become my little helper, showering them with attention when I need a minute or two to handle other matters. The three of them are so close right now, and it just warms my heart. Simone knows that Frankie loves her and she is so secure in that fact. I know without question that Grant will soon feel the same.
Will this “sibling love” continue? That’s the question. And what is my role in the development and fostering of their relationship? At some point, do I step back and let them steer the course of their relationship, and if so, when?
Thinking back on my childhood, my brother and I were very close. We played together all the time and I always wanted to be around him. As adults, we share a special bond and connection, but I wouldn’t say we’re “close.” He has my back, and I have his, but we really don’t know the details of each other’s lives. In fact, non-family members are much closer to me in this regard. Maybe that’s okay. Still, I can’t help but think how awesome it would be if we were closer. I can’t pinpoint when our relationship changed from being two peas in a pod. But, it did.
I’ve accepted that I can’t force my kids to stay close as they age, but guess what, I sure as heck am going to try.